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Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Got bored doing tutorials

In the Beginning, there was Voltage. And from Voltage, the LORD made Hardware.

Hardware begat Binary and Binary begat Firmware and Software. The LORD looked upon Hardware and Software, and lo, it was good.

Meanwhile, Software begat Operating Systems and Operating Systems begat Microsoft, and the LORD looked upon MS-DOS and behold, upon the cheek of the LORD, a tear was seen.

The LORD made Geeks and Geeks begat Unix, but they really should have begat GUI too. As it was, MS-DOS begat Windows 95 and Windows 95 begat Windows 98 and there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, for with Windows came Viruses, Worms and Trojans, and Really Crappy Software, as well as Power Users.

The LORD drew apart the firmament and made Networking, and Networking begat the Internet, and the LORD had a moment of misgiving, for the Internet begat Bloggers, and Bloggers begat Crap Without End.

The Internet begat E-Mail and E-Mail begat Spam, and the LORD wept. The Geeks begat SpamAssassin and Bayesian Filtering, but Spam was mightier still. In despair, the LORD begat IM, but Spam begat Sexbots.

However, Evil always contains the seeds of its own destruction, for now the Internet is down because of Spam and every Luser, Geeks, Power Users, Bloggers and Microsoft Programmers alike, went out to find a Life.

The LORD made Beer, and Geeks got Laid and lo, all was well again.
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Winners of Adrian Coolness Points:

The Feisty Bitch: For reasons best known to ourselves. (1)
The Feisty Bitch: For getting featured on the Sunday Times (2)
Adri: For being geeky enough to write recursive prose. (1)
Sheena: For really, really liking my blog. (1)
Sheena: For the use of her finger. (2)
Sheena: For getting on the Straits Times. (3)
Ivan: For referring to me as one of "Singapore's leading bloggers". (1)
Ivan: For coming up with the PubicLicezilla idea. (2)
The Big Fuck: For being such a big fuck. (1)
The Big Fuck: For making the miniature Badge of Lewdness. (2)
Anonymous fan: For making a cool finger. (1)
Celly: For appreciating the genius behind the Pagan Bible here. (1)
Icebreeze: For being wise enough to flatter me. (1)
Barffie: For furthering the LEWD cause by appearing in the papers. (1)
Blinkymummy: For furthering the LEWD cause by appearing in TWO papers within the space of two days, fuckin' A! (2)
Jess: For being observant enough to spot the similarity between Lewdites and Luddites. You rock, babe. (1)
Jiameei: For being my champion against anonymous hecklers. (1)

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