Movies
The Myth aka 神话
I am puzzled as to the nature of their immortality. Do they not have to eat? Do they not get bored? How come, in over 2000 years, the two immortals (Korean chick and Chinese guy) never once thought of going out for a spin? I mean, their emperor was dead, and it wouldn't take a genius to figure out that after a hundred years, everyone who ever knew them would be dead also. Why did they not go out to, you know, check things out?

Yes, I know some of you smartasses out there will be saying shite like "but the cave was sealed ROTFLMAO OMFGWTF!!!111", but seriously, if you're immortal, you can dig at solid rock with your bare hands for a coupla hundred years and you'd still get out.

Also, how come Jacky could understand those fossils? Presumably, the language must have changed quite a bit in 4000 years.

How come a modern day elderly professor, who has spent most of his life as an academic, could defeat, in unarmed combat, an immortal Qin dynasty general, eternally preserved at the peak of physical fitness, who'd spent only his entire life fighting in wars and surviving mortal combat with his enemies?

And how come the Korean chick was still waiting for her ancient Chinese general, whom she'd never even had the chance to fuck? I mean, come on, humans have urges, right? You can't seriously be telling me that after, oh, the first two centuries or so, the Qin dynasty general, a hot-blooded young man physiologically, would not have started porking her. I mean, seriously, considering the way she looked, even if he were a monk instead of a warrior, he'd have fucked her after like, the first 30 years or so.

Come on, now, Mr. Jacky Chan. Your martial arts is awesome and all, but do you seriously think that any chick would wait 2000 years for you? Shit, your ego is even bigger than mine, and for that, I tip my hat off to you.

Not his greatest film ever.

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To be continued . . .

Update: I was going to review Domino, but then there's really not much to say there. It's a smashing movie, and you get to see Keira's tits, so just go watch it.  ¶
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