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Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Fat is a valid reason to break up

Yesterday I was reading the local rag, and there was this article written by some journo, let's call her L. In a nutshell, the article was about one of her friends getting dumped by her boyfriend because she was fat. L then throws a neurotic hissyfit about how looks shouldn't be that important and about how superficial men are.

Now, this is a perfect example of why I don't read the local rag much. Firstly, come on, you know you're scraping the bottom of the barrel if you start writing about your friend's relationship woes in the leading newspaper in the country, even if it is in the entertainment section. I mean, her friend isn't even a celebrity, so whatever, you know?

Secondly, isn't a romantic relationship by definition a very subjective thing? People are attracted to and repelled by all sorts of things that were either hardwired into them or the result of their experiences in life. Whatever the reason, they probably can't help their reactions to these things, and even if they could change, why should they do so? Because you think they "should"? Grow the fuck up and get the fuck over yourself, L. What everyone "should" have is the right to select or reject partners based on their own sets of preferences. If you think that's unfair, well, get used to it, honey, because that's the way it is, and there's no "should" or "shouldn't" about it. If you can't jive with that, then maybe you "shouldn't" read so many fluffy romance novels where unconditional love is the norm rather than the exception.

What's this bullshit I keep hearing about unconditional love anyway? There's no such thing. You can go on and on about how some chick's boyfriend got into an accident and became a vegetable but she still stuck by him, but that's still not unconditional love. That's probably just obligation and responsibility, or residual love at best. The chick loves the memory of the man, not an inert organism who can't even converse with her. Unconditional love would be falling in love with a vegetable, which would immediately suggest to me that the chick is in need of help.

Thirdly, the single most tangible characteristic that distinguishes a romantic relationship from a platonic one is - let's face it - sex. So what happens to a romantic relationship if one party no longer desires the other? It becomes a non-romantic relationship. It may not be exactly platonic, but it's definitely not romantic. So why "shouldn't" they both go looking for partners who are more ideal?

L goes on to mention that one of her male friends said that looks are to men what money is to women. In other words, women go for men with money in much the same way that men go for women with looks, and therefore, women are just as superficial as men. This is pretty much true, especially in Singapore. L, after mentioning that her friend said that, then goes on and on about how women are less superficial than men because they are more forgiving than men where looks are concerned. This made me wonder if L did not understand her male friend or if she was just stupid. Hello? Shouldn't she be arguing that women do not go for money to make her point that women aren't superficial instead of arguing that women do not go for looks, which we've pretty much established?

Finally, L says that she has dated men of all shapes and sizes and that she knows of many other women who would do the same, and cites this as evidence of the generosity of women. I could make the same point for men by saying that I would go for broke, dumb hot chicks and that I know of many men who have done the same and proceed to lament the fact that women don't love us as we are because they always want us to be intelligent and at least financially stable. However, since I'm not a journalist in Singapore's leading newspaper, I shall not use such an "intelligent" argument. I shall instead make the point that you can't expect others to have low expectations just because you do. Otherwise, you're going to be one sorely disappointed motherfucker.

In conclusion, fat is not only a valid reason for breaking up, it is as good (or as "bad") as any other reason for doing so.

P.S. There are of course exceptions to the rules. My girlfriend, for example, is definitely not with me for the money. That should be rather obvious because I have none.


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