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Wednesday, March 24, 2004
People are dumb.

Men are fucking stupid, but women are even dumber because they fall for men anyway. Allow me to elaborate. There are lots of different types of fucking stupid men out there, but they all have one thing in common. Well, they have two things in common, which are that they all have dicks and that they're fucking stupid. Men know, however, that no matter how badly they fuck up, they will get women anyway. Any gays that lambast me over this post will get a metaphorical cactus rammed up their metaphorical asses. I'm obviously referring solely to heterosexual men here.

Let's go into a bit more detail about the two main ways men can be fucking stupid. First, there are guys who like to work the sensitive guy angle, the so-called SNAGS (an acronym for Sensitive New Age Guy), who are in tune with their "feminine side". These are the people who whine about pimples and relationship problems in irc or IMs. Jeez, is that supposed to impress people? Males do not have "feminine sides". I'd have thought that no girl could have ever fallen for a fucking SNAG, the reason being that their pricks are almost certainly perpetually flaccid, but I was wrong. Apparently SNAGs still get women. However, these women are almost certainly ugly ones. Poor SNAGs. You work so hard to go against your natures in the hopes of getting laid by hot chicks only to find that hot chicks are secretly disgusted by your lack of balls and want to be "just friends". You guys are fucking stupid, because only ugly bitches will dig someone who doesn't say "get the fuck out of my face, you ugly bitch" to them as a knee-jerk response.

Secondly, we have the jocks, who are also fucking stupid because they're, well, fucking stupid. SNAGs at least have the brains to be hypocrites, but jocks could never aspire to that level of stupidity. Jocks actually think that sweat turns women on. What a bunch of stupid pricks. Look, no one except 14-year-olds are interested in how many baskets you can make in one game or how many goals you can shoot. They're interested in how many fucking diamonds you can buy them, which will be zero if you continue to play sports to impress girls and don't start growing some brains. Not only will you eventually lose the position you had at the top of the pussy chain when you were a tin god in school, you will eventually have to bag some former geek's grocery when you find your true calling in life as a cashier at some grocery store. You guys suck ass because although you probably can sustain erections (as opposed to SNAGs with limp dongs), you will never be able to use them after the age of 16. Except on ugly chicks, of course, since they couldn't get anyone better and don't really mind what you think as long as you stick it in.

There you have it, the two extremes of how fucking dumb guys can be. Of course, there are other ways guys can be fucking stupid, but they're all variations between the two extremes. Now we come to the women. Why is it that when you dumb bitches start dating someone, he is suddenly elevated to demigod status in your eyes? No matter how sordid his background, no matter how deadbeat his career, no matter how crude or dumb he is, if he's the chump stupid enough to date your ass (and I do mean your ass, because that's what all guys want in the end: tail), the sun rises and sets in his eyes for you. He's just like every other fucking guy on the street, for fuck's sake. It doesn't just stop there, too. Once a girl falls for a guy, no matter how much he cheats on her or otherwise abuses her, she will generally try everything to "work things out". Get real. Once the bloke sticks his wang into someone else's twat, the shit ain't working no more.

People are so depressingly stupid
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