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Saturday, September 15, 2007
 
Moralistic e-mail

Recently, I received one of those chain e-mails containing moral lessons. Moral lessons? Sent to me? Obviously, this chick does not know me very well. Anyway, here's the email, interspersed with my comments (in italics).

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

What's with the cheap Star Wars ripoff? What next? "And separation leads to the Dark Side"?

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".

I think the fact that she's calling up numbers she found in her husband's pocket pretty much implies that trust is already dead between them, genius. Besides, what's the moral of the story here? To always reply "PUB" when someone calls?



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NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"

The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

Oh, fuck me dead now please. This must have been written by someone with a serious self-esteem problem. The secret to a successful marriage is in believing that your wife settled for you because she couldn't do better for herself? I have a better strategy. Find a wife who has low self-esteem like the bugger who wrote this. That way, you can do whatever the hell you want and she will still stand by you.

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

Yes, but the finger pointing at you says "idiot", while the fingers pointing at me says "god". Moron.

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.

Bullshit. Jesus forgave the Romans and got nailed to a piece of wood for it. Sometimes, you don't even need to make mistakes for others to not forgive you. History is filled with examples of this sort of behaviour. What kind of ignorant ass writes crap like that?

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CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

Basically, I think anyone who goes looking for a spouse at a government agency is most likely fucked up anyway, so no further comment

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.

Just when I thought the author of this crap must be an utter moron, he manages to squeeze out some wisdom. Remember, kids. If you want to be happy, keep dating. Marriage is not only a nightmare, it is a nightmare from which it is extremely difficult to wake.

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NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

Love does conquer a lot and people do change for love. The problem is that marriage does not equate to love. Most people change for their partners when they fall in love and change back when they get married, because you see, marriage was invented by possessive people with low self-esteem who believe that without a legally-binding contract, their lovers wouldn't stay with them. In most cases, they are right, and they go on to make their spouses miserable for the rest of their natural lives. That's the way life is, motherfuckers. Deal with it. Heheheheheh.

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

Naturally. The bugger's got an enforceable claim on you now, idiot. Of course s/he's gonna act the fool now!

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..

Yes, the key to no unhappiness is to follow the path of least resistance and become a loser. The key to happiness is quite different, though.

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RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

Hey, fuck y'all if you can't take a joke, is what I say. What's the point of having friends or lovers if you have to be on guard even when you're with them? If she can't take my humour, she can fucking leave.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you married me. Other wise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

They should just have a ménage à trois.

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.

Eggs? What the fuck... Welcome to the Land of Bad Metaphor.

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PERSONAL PERCEPTION

Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey? "Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."

The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders.

It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..

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BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

How come this stuff always happens in the States? Do the people who make up these stories think that locating them in the States somehow gives it credibility because everybody in their target audience just takes it as a given that the US is populated by loons? I seriously doubt this ever happened. And what is the moral of the story here? To not rough up your kid so bad that he loses his fingers? And if for some reason, you absolutely have to, don't make him an orphan after that? Yeah, thanks a lot, we all didn't know that before.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

What are you suggesting, that we should overlook any mistakes our loved ones make on the basis of that fictitious moron's actions? What kind of crap is that? I think most of us would just give the lad a good spanking, dipshit. Not all of us are fucking psychos who would break the hands of our own offspring in the name of discipline, ok? Thanks for your help, anyway.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

But the actions we took in a rage were also mistakes, and hence, by your reasoning, we are allowed to make them, right, Einstein?


Don AQ, leading the fight in the Holy War Against Stupidity.

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Comments:
Oh but BUT, don't we all wish sometimes that we could be trusted and also to trust others? I mean, to hell with idealism but most of us like to seek out the goodness in others and also for others to seek out the goodness in us, crappy chain emails or not.
 
Well, maybe, but I think e-mails with dumb stories do not illustrate that.
 
Question - Are you married, have you ever been married, a parent, etc.

Answer - If no to any of the above, then enuff said
 
rajah: One does not have to be married to perceive unhappiness. Nor does one need to have offspring to know that breaking their fingers in a pique is wrong. And what question is your "answer" answering, anyhow? Your question/answer pair makes no sense. (Not to mention the fact that a question mark usually follows a question!) Allow me to show you how to do it.

Question - Are you intelligent, have you ever been intelligent, have you ever had an IQ higher than room temperature?

Answer - No to all the above.

There. I hope we've all learned something today.
 
Don't flatter yourself...I am intelligent..more so than you. Care to verify. You're just pompus, don't confuse that with intelligence
 
LMFAO
 
"Pompus"? Is that an English word? As you can see, I'm at least intelligent enough to spell, heheheheh.
 
Albeit being slightly late, but FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT~
 
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