Tattoo
So I played a game of DotA just before sleeping tonight, and one of the IRC kiddies in our team asked me if I was new (to the game). My reply was, "I'm more pro† than you." Almost immediately after that I had a dominating streak (4 consecutive kills without dying).

After the game, my friends and I had the usual post-game debrief, and the three of us agreed that our teammates from IRC were very noisy. In our lingo, this meant that they were nosey and were attempting to give advice to their betters. Anyway, during the debrief, I found that I still have the ability to crack myself up.

me: one of them even asked me if I was new sial*.
me: they cannot see the word "pro" tattooed on my forehead, is it?

For some reason, I found that fucking hilarious.

Seriously, what I should have told that guy was "don't teach your father how to fuck".

†"Pro" is Singaporean gaming lingo for a really good player, derived from the word "professional". It is the antonym of "noob", which is a derivative of the word "newbie", which is in turn derived from "new". Pro can be used both as a noun (as in "I'm a pro") and as an adjective (as in "that guy is so pro").
*"Sial" is a Malay vulgarity, commonly used by Singaporeans of all races at the end of sentences to add emphasis. Sort of like the way k3w| d00dz use "omfg wtf rotflmao!!!111"  ¶
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