Advertisers are stupid fucks and so are you
Seriously, what the fuck is up with McDonald's? As those of you residing in Singapore probably already know, Chinese New Year is just around the corner. In response to this arguably most important of Chinese holidays, McDonald's has launched . . . curly fries? Excuse me, but the last time I checked, the traditional staple food of the Chinese isn't potatoes in the first place. Even when we do eat potatoes, we usually don't fry them, and we definitely don't make them curly. The curly fries even cost more than regular fries. You, the humble reader, may not understand why I'm saying all this, but I'll make it clear presently.

The point is that I seriously do not see what the fuck curly fries have to do with Chinese New Year. It's clearly just a scam to make you pay more for less. Why do I say that? Firstly, if you had half a brain, you'd instantly perceive that more straight fries can be stuffed into the containers they use than curly ones, so you're already losing out in terms of quantity. Wondering if there was anything special about curly fries besides the shape, I tried some. Nope. They still tasted like potatoes. In other words, you do not gain value in terms of quality either. The prosperity burgers or whatever they call it didn't taste anything like any type of ethnic Chinese food, either.

What the fuck is going on here? I have no information whatsoever about how they came up with this retarded idea, so I shall have settle for the next best thing. Baseless conjecture and malicious slamming. Obviously, what happened was that some executive at McDonald's woke up one morning and thought, "Hey, Chinese New Year is approaching. Let's piss everyone off by having a promotion totally unrelated to that but call it a Chinese New Year promotion anyway!" That's probably how the mind of an advertiser works, more or less. I mean, come on. It's not a Chinese New Year promotion just because you add the word "Prosperity" to it. What's with their coming up with some sort of "prosperity" promotion every fucking year, anyway? Is it supposed to be a racial slur against the greed of the Chinese or something? Talk about stereotyping.

I would like to tie up the idiot who came up with that campaign and shoot him in the feet. Then I'd blow his kneecaps off. Following that, I'd shoot his . . . but I'm getting carried away. My point is that most of the ad campaigns we see today are totally lame ideas which could only have come from complete morons. Now, before you start sniggering, humble readers, remember this. They're still in business only because you fucking idiots lap up the shit they spew at you. So you're, if anything, even bigger morons than the advertisers. Now, fuck off and die, please.  ¶
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