I Am Midas
First things first, my ego. As you may have noticed, I have a rather large one and, recently, it just got bigger. Check out the Big Fuck's latest post.

It seems he had a bet with a friend that he would achieve 10000 hits within a month, and he won the bet. What has this got to do with my ego, you may ask? Well, I was the first to plug his blog. Don't just take my word for it. The man himself said so in his list of people he would like to thank for helping him win the bet. Here's what he said.

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I'd like to thank:

1) Adrian - man, this guy was one of the first to link me, and definitely the first to plug me. This shows his exquisite taste in blogs. Actually, this guy really does have some pretty fucking good taste in blogs; every time he plugs a blog, I check it out, and it's quality. I'd been reading Celly's blog for a while when he plugged it, and I've been thinking "shit, I wished I'd plugged her first" ever since. Seriously, you should go read his blog, not only because it is cool, but also because he has a fucking good eye for the funny.

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Note that I was the first person he thanked. I think I should say something appropriate here.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

You are most welcome, Big Fuck. Thank you for making my day as well! Having said that, I must say in all honesty that there's a degree of self-interest involved as well. Before explaining to you guys what it is, I shall make the observation that twice now in his blog, there have been comments about his blatant grab for fame. One of those was from an earlier post which I shall not bother to dig up, being a lazy ass, but it said something like "I enjoy your blog, but your reaching for fame is unseemly". The other one is in the latest post, and here's what it says.

"I can't help but wonder - is the 15 minutes worth all these?

I think blogging popularity is overrated. But I guess it's just me :p"

In the first place, I doubt that it is a mere 15 minutes with the Big Fuck. I'm not kidding here. The guy is talented, and will probably keep his readers for as long as they have a sense of humour. In the second place, being a bit of a fame whore myself, I must say that yes, it is totally worth it. Although I do not really blog for the sake of having more readers, it is still nice to know that people do enjoy reading what I write.

Now we come to the element of self-interest in my plugging other blogs. You see, I do want more hits, but I am unwilling to comment on blogs which I don't really like just to generate more hits. Instead, what I do is that when I come across a blog, such as the Big Fuck's, or Celly's, or Jess's blog, which I know has the potential to become hugely popular, I plug them first. Being nice people who aren't yet popular (and also because my blog totally rocks, of course), they link me in return. This would probably be more difficult if they were already popular, since I would then seem like just one of the fame whores (although I am) for linking them and commenting on their blogs. Too many people already doing that would ensure that I am but one of the crowd and this would in turn ensure that I do not get linked. In other words, Big Fuck, Jess and Celly, you've been had! I knew this would happen all along!

I think it's time for an evil laugh, don't you think?

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Seriously, it's sort of like doing business. You can spend all your money buying shares in companies that are already making big money and have a small share in these companies, or you can pick a small business that shows promise, invest in it, and end up owning a larger share of it when it grows (a metaphor for being linked in their sidebars instead of being one of a thousand crummy links in their comment boxes). So, there you go, my (sort of) guide to achieving some measure of popularity for your own blog.

Of course, as in doing business, you need to have an eye for it. When I first read the Big Fuck, I told the Feisty Bitch over coffee "this guy is going to be huge". When I first read Celly, I had a similar hunch. Jess was a no-brainer. A blog with pictures of a hot babe who professes to be a slut? Come the fuck on, who could resist that?

Last of all, even if you did all of the above, you cannot ensure the popularity of your blog without the most crucial ingredient. You must write an enjoyable blog. Actually, it doesn't really matter what approach you take in your quest for popularity. If you have the content, you will have the hits. Well, sooner or later.

In an uncharacteristic moment of candour and modesty, I must confess that I think my blog will probably not end up immensely popular, partly because I do not desire that it be so. If popularity were my only goal, I'd spend my entire time doing dumbshit posts like the PubicLicezilla post. I blog partly because I like to write, and partly because I like it when people like what I write. I probably would not like it if I were as popular as Xiaxue, and my "fans" were mostly a bunch of idiots. As it is, most of the readers I am aware of are intelligent, and knowing that intelligent people like what I write is the best reward of all.

Ok, I guess that wasn't terribly modest, but what did you expect from a blog whose title is "I Rock, You Suck"?

That said, my foresight kicks ass! I am the venture capitalist of the blogging scene! So far, I've been spot on about every blog that I thought would become popular. Every blog that has been rocked by the sucker has seen huge increases in traffic. I am Midas! So if you have an unknown blog and would like to become popular, drop me a comment. If the rocker decides to suck you, you's gon be famous!  ¶
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