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Wednesday, August 03, 2005
There's no "team" in "I"

The I
There's no "team" in "I", and if you can't handle that, well, find yourself another "I", ok? "I" is not a democracy. "I" does not care about your feelings. Everything you do if you want to be with this "I" must be for the good of the "I". Think not of what the "I" can do for all of you, but what all of you can do for the "I". The "I" is bigger than all of you, individually or collectively.

You see, there's something you must all learn about being with the "I", and that is that the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many. If the "I" has prior engagements or even, indeed, last minute appointments with his beer buddies, then it is up to the team to cover for him. That's what being with the "I" is all about.

If the team can master this simple concept, then the "I" becomes more than just an "I", it becomes family. The bonds formed start to go beyond those of a working relationship, and someday, the "I" might even confer upon the team the singular honour of borrowing beer money from them. Isn't that something worth fighting for?

Oh, so now the team wants to find another "I"? You all think you'd be better off without this "I", even if you have to do all this shit by yourselves? Fine, then. The "I" will have no problems finding another team, you just wait and see. The "I"'s next team will be even more brilliant and accomodating to the "I"'s needs than this selfish team could ever manage to be. If the "I" leaves, he's never coming back.

He's really leaving now, ok? Yeah, just let him collect his things first, all right? Looks like you're all not going to change your minds, huh? Fine, then. The "I" can do without you. Stupid bunch of ingrates.

Style inspired by the Onion's comment pieces.
"I"-centeredness rules! Everyone else can be miserable so long as I am happy!

"I" can kick more ass than you dumbasses
working in a team.

Boo yea!
The LEWD tag is gone from imgsatellite!!!! I WANT MY LEWD TAG!
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Winners of Adrian Coolness Points:

The Feisty Bitch: For reasons best known to ourselves. (1)
The Feisty Bitch: For getting featured on the Sunday Times (2)
Adri: For being geeky enough to write recursive prose. (1)
Sheena: For really, really liking my blog. (1)
Sheena: For the use of her finger. (2)
Sheena: For getting on the Straits Times. (3)
Ivan: For referring to me as one of "Singapore's leading bloggers". (1)
Ivan: For coming up with the PubicLicezilla idea. (2)
The Big Fuck: For being such a big fuck. (1)
The Big Fuck: For making the miniature Badge of Lewdness. (2)
Anonymous fan: For making a cool finger. (1)
Celly: For appreciating the genius behind the Pagan Bible here. (1)
Icebreeze: For being wise enough to flatter me. (1)
Barffie: For furthering the LEWD cause by appearing in the papers. (1)
Blinkymummy: For furthering the LEWD cause by appearing in TWO papers within the space of two days, fuckin' A! (2)
Jess: For being observant enough to spot the similarity between Lewdites and Luddites. You rock, babe. (1)
Jiameei: For being my champion against anonymous hecklers. (1)

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