left work early today. the damn place was soo over staffed and i had absolutely nothing to do. the worst part was that so many of the staff were newbies and it was just too boring to stay on. if it were the good old days where calvin, alex were still working, i would say that having nothing to do and getting paid would be a good thing. but, things are not what they used to be. working in altivo is just getting more and more boring. but yet the perks of working there keep me from just simply quitting. the easy work and the good money plus the staff benefits are all very good pull factors.
went to meet daphne to get ciggies after i left work at 12 sharp. that was followed by a long drive down to meet alex and joleen for supper. it wouldn't have been that bad but guess what. PIE was closed from 1am - 5am. i nearly wanted to stay at alex's place. in the end, i took the ecp/aye route home. gawd it was a freaking long lonely drive. but as always, i love to see the scenery at the transition from ecp to aye. the city-view on the right, coupled with the sea-view on the left. hehe i love that stretch of the sheares bridge.
for the millionth time, i really got to get down and do up my fyp. i am going crazy over this shit. i know i gotta do it, but i hate doing it. yet the stakes are too high not to do a good job. argh. life sucks because of fyp.
i went to church on sunday. granted that my original motive for going to church was not right, but i was amazed at the sermon. i mean it's christmas time and all, i sort of expected either a gospel sermon or some christmas-related sermon. but oh no, God spoke to me with a sermon on lonliness and about the prodigal son. now, for you people who don't know who the prodigal son is, kindly read Luke 15. anyway, to cut a long sermon short, it really appealed to me.and that was not the first time that such a thing happened. many times when i go to church, i can just feel that the sermon was spoken by God through the preacher just for me. of course in some cases the issue is rather generic, but i can sense God's hand in the midst of it.
the 3 reasons for lonliness were lonliness of service, sin and separation. and of course the 3 remedies proposed were to go about God's work, fellowship with His people and know that we are not really alone (since God is always with us). it sounds very common sensical now in retrospect. but when i was hearing it, it struck me rather hard. not like a slap but more like a shake to the shoulder. i think it is time i take heed and seek God. yet changing is very difficult especially all the vices. but no matter what, i think something needs to be done. it IS time for some spring cleaning.
you NEVER forget that skirt that was sold out or that top that does not come in your size. never mind that you have a whole cupboard full of lovely stuff, what you can't lay your hands on is always the best and will always be the things on your mind. sometimes this does strange things to you.
i remember when i was young, i was made to carry the same old dirty pink bag to school from pri 1 to pri 3 when everyone else was carrying niffy backpacks with drawstrings. i was still stucked on that bulky haversack with so out-of-fashion cartoons (batman was all the rage in primary 3). now i have a collection of over 50 bags. not exactly your wow-wow-wow range, but more than most of the people i know. as for shoes, no less than 50 pairs as well. it seems as though i am subconsciously making up for that one bag i missed out on when i was young and the boring velcro canvas shoes i was wearing for 3 years when people have moved on to laces (i knew how to tie them when i was in primary 3 so that's not the reason).
this would apply to people as well. many of my friends are still pinning for that person whom they could never be with. some are playing mind-games with those who ignore them despite having many suitors. the saying that "nice guys finish last" does seem to hold some truth after all doesnt it?
people are suckers for things are are absent